This painting kills me. It’s titled “Brave Cone Dog” and it’s by a wry, puckish character named Brandon Bird, who makes very witty pop art. I don’t have much to say about the minimalist image, because it speaks (morosely, piteously, hilariously) for itself. I own a framed print of it, and everyday it stirs in me an emotional milkshake.

This I like, from a recent book review: “Walter Benjamin wrote that a truly great sentence is one that’s been burnished to perfection, then sabotaged in some respect. Wounded or weakened just sufficiently to seduce.”
As a kid, I was a quivering hypochondriac. To wit: At age 7 I had a cramp on the left side of my belly that lasted a couple hours. Convinced it was appendicitis, I curled into a ball in my parents’ empty bed and envisioned horrors of surgery and gloom and, yes, death. The cramp subsided and I proceeded to watch TV, tear-streaked. Around age 9 I had a swollen bruise on my knee that I mistook for a malignant tumor. I crumpled on my bedroom floor in a sleeping bag, too distraught to clamber into bed, and imagined losing my leg to certain amputation. Later, I calmed and accepted that it was just a bruise and I watched TV, tear-streaked. I still often misdiagnose myself, hurling me into fleeting, fluttery hysteria. Then I watch TV, tear-streaked. Reader, WebMD is your foe.
In this week’s “By the Book” column in The New York Times, singer-author-badass Patti Smith is asked “What’s the last great book you read?” She replies:
Recently I was captured by two small, addictive works. “Kingdom Cons,” by the Mexican author Yuri Herrera, floored me. … And “Star,” by Yukio Mishima, is a startlingly modern, hypervisual jewel; it could be a really interesting movie. Both books were mesmerizing, seeming to fall in my hands from an alternative sky.
As I’m doing a semi-immersion in Japanese literature and film in preparation for a fall trip to Japan, I picked up “Star,” which is about a hot movie actor in existential distress. From Smith’s zippy description, I expect glitter and diamonds.
At the cafe today, a 30-something hipster in a wool fedora, four-day stubble and ratty Chuck Taylors sans socks sat next to me, slipped on headphones and went on to loudly tap his feet and roll his head, wearing an imbecilic grin, all but dancing in his seat. I wanted to spill his kombucha. Was I wrong? And: He wore a large thumb ring.
One of the Japanese movies I’m revisiting before I go to Japan is “Ichi the Killer,” a shock-cinema bloodbath from bad boy auteur Takashi Miike (say: Meek-a). About a kidnapped yakuza boss, his punky minion — a psychopathic sadomasochist whose specialty is baroque disfigurement — and the titular hero, a bullied weakling out for revenge, this notoriously twisted crime comedy was tonic jazz the first time I saw it. Now it mostly plays as an extreme exercise in tedious transgression: How disgusting can we get? Bloated with rape, murder, drugs, gangsters, prostitution, masturbation, self-mutilation, unthinkable torture, disembowelment and ample amputation, the film is set in the sometimes seamy nightlife district of Shinjuku in Tokyo. Which is where I’m staying.
I‘ve owned pet rats named Phoebe, Becky, Tammy and LaShonda. A friend told me I’d inadvertently given the rats the names of receptionists at construction companies.
The other day I actually saw a guy rollerblading in the neighborhood. That is something you cannot unsee. It’s sort of like seeing someone on a unicycle.
Words I love: blithe, bloviate, evanescent, loquacious. Let’s add nincompoopery to the list.
“Let’s add nincompoopery to the list.”
Words containing ‘poop’ always have that special something other, lesser, words just don’t bring to the table.There’s a certain rebellious raunchyness to them. Good choice.
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Thanks, Orca Flotta! You always have the most intriguing replies. Love it.
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WebMD is the worst. I can’t count the number of times that I’ve diagnosed myself dead or dying
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All those medical sites are morbidly misleading. I used to print out all my symptoms from WebMD, etc., and bring them to my doctor appointments. The doctor invariably wanted to strangle me. Quacks! he’d say.
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Total hypochondriac here too. My thoughts always go to appendicitis when my stomach hurts, and brain aneurysm when I have a headache, though my aunt actually did have a brain aneurysm burst when I was a kid, so I think that fear is semi-valid. My partner had a 24 hour stomach bug last week, so I was deliberately eating bland foods for days in anticipation of it hitting me, and as soon as I let down my guard and had some enchiladas – BOOM! Horrible puking sickness. So if anything I should have been even more paranoid on this occasion.
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Headaches = instant brain tumor for me. Let’s be careful out there!
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I adore that bit about the perfect sentence.
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I read the first 3 books in the Sea of Fertility tetralogy. I can’t really say why I didn’t read the 4th. It was many years ago but the 1st book Spring Snow left a lasting impression.
It was during a period when I was looking for authors out the mainstream, although that’s probably a poor way to put it.
During that period I discovered the Egyptian writer Naguib Mahfouz. His Cairo Trilogy is a masterpiece. Check it out.
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For years I’ve heard how wonderful the Cairo Trilogy is. It’s now officially on my list.
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